Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Thoughts on my grandparents


My parents came to visit us this weekend for Easter, and as he often does, my dad got to telling stories about his family. It's a long, convoluted history, with many twists and turns, just like any good story of immigrants making good in America. My father is 75 years old, and he was the next to the last of 11 children born to his parents, who came to New York City from the dusty privations of their former lives in Sicily around the turn of the century. My grandmother, Theresa, had met my grandfather, Philip, in Sicily but they got married in America. She was a teenager then, trying to adjust to the change from farming life (she carried water jugs on her head in Sicily!) to the tenement jungle of New York. My grandfather toiled with untold numbers of other Italian immigrants to lay bricks and mix cement, building Manhattan from the ground up. My grandmother? Well, she gave birth.

And she had miscarriages, too -- nobody knows how many. But she bore 11 live babies, 10 of whom made it to adulthood. (See them all in my parents' wedding picture above!) In the photos of her as a young woman, what is most striking is the look of determination on her face. It's as if she's thinking: I dare you to throw something at me that I can't handle.

My dad tells the story of the local midwife, a German woman who attended Theresa through her 11 births. My grandmother was apparently legendary for her ability to give birth effortlessly. I like to picture her throwing her elegant, black, wavy hair (for which she was also famous) out of her eyes, clambering up onto the kitchen table, and settling down calmly to the task of pushing out another baby. No epidurals for her! When I delivered the Peanut I pictured her spirit hovering over one of my shoulders and that of my mother's mother (who gave birth eight times) over the other. Those imperturbable, hard-as-nails Italian women, whose lives were studies in hardships and misery, yet they kept going forward. Always forward.

Someday I want to tell the Peanut their stories. How her Italian ancestors helped build New York, and how the Chinese immigrants, ancestors of her daddy's family, who worked their way from China all the way to Ohio and then back to California, built the train tracks that expanded across the whole country. How, without the rest of the world, there wouldn't be an America.

"Conservatarded whackadoodle"

I am totally stealing this phrase from the very talented TRex. Practically spit coffee on my screen laughing when I read that.

Also, I wish more people were aware of this very obvious hole in the "pro-life" argument:

The other thing that’s just appalling to me about people who call themselves “pro-life” is the fact that they support the Republican party’s Endless War agenda without any thought whatsoever. How can you be against the “slaughter of babies” here in America and yet joyously advocate the slaughter of real-live, already-born babies and children on the other side of the world? That’s what I don’t get. You would think that anyone with even a modicum of thinking skills would see the inherent contradiction there.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Not-so-happy feet

We recently got the DVD of "Happy Feet" from Netflix. I've learned by now that we need to check these movies out before we show them to the Peanut, and this one proves why.

Memo to filmmakers: if you're going to promote a movie by showing lots of pictures of cute dancing animals, it is maybe not the best idea to devote a good chunk of the actual movie to depictions of menacing monster animals trying to eat the main, fuzzy characters. Was the scene with the yellow-toothed seal thing necessary? Or the one with the carnivorous birds? The one with the scary whales? How about the delightful part when the main character, poor Mumble, goes insane from being in a zoo? If I wanted to be depressed I'd rent a Michael Moore documentary, not a fuzzy-animated-animal movie, goddamn it!

So we had to do our usual trick of watching the movie with remote in hand, zipping past the scary parts so the Peanut could see the singing baby penguins, which she just adored. (She is also obsessed with Mort from Madagascar, and keeps asking for a stuffed-animal Mort.)

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Insert your own Fox News joke here.

Ouch

The Peanut's occasional potty training setbacks have nothing on this. This type of thing is one reason why, even if I had the strength to carry her on my shoulders, I wouldn't go there.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Various items

It's been a weird couple of weeks -- stressful and aggravating but cathartic. I wasn't feeling like I had much to say but I suppose I should jump back into the saddle again ...which I will do with some random observations/rants:

  • If I hear one more word in the media, mainstream or otherwise (I'm looking at you, Air America Radio) about Eliot Freaking Spitzer I am going to stick my head out the window and start hollering like Howard Beale. Did the guy pay for his "seven diamond prostitute" with tax dollars supplied by the citizens of New York? No? Then Shut. The. Hell. Up. about it already! Why should anyone who is not married to, or otherwise related to, this guy care whether he frequents even, say, a "two diamond prostitute"? Yeah, he's a hypocrite. So are, unfortunately, many Democrats, and pretty much every Republican elected official, in one way or another. Until "Diaper Dave" Vitter and Larry "Wide Stance" Craig resign, I don't want to hear another goddamn thing about Spitzer.

  • By all means, the Democratic candidates for president should have another debate. If they want us all to shoot ourselves in the head, that is.

  • Speaking of which: Hilary, you need to go away now. It's all over but the screaming and crying about how it was Your Turn and you've been unfairly cheated out of your rightful legacy, or some damn thing. Just step aside and let Obama have his day. I wasn't sure at first if he'd earned it but now it seems he's got the chops. It's time for the country to unite behind Obama so we can start the hard work of taking our country back from the clowns who have done this to it. And to us.

  • My husband, who has a Chinese last name equivalent to "Smith," and a not-so-common Chinese first name, was delayed in getting on a plane this week because there's apparently someone on the "No Fly List" with the same name. Once they verified his age, he was declared Not A Terrorist and allowed to go on his way. We'll see if we're as lucky the next time we try to fly somewhere...

  • The Peanut seems to be slowly coming out of the spiral of really bad behavior we've been seeing, on and off, ever since she turned 3. What's interesting is she intersperses her nightmare tantrums with periods of incredible sweetness--she'll tell us she loves us 10 times a day. Mr. Fraulein and I keep thinking that it just must be really hard, sometimes, to be 3. "My hips hurt, Mommy," she'll say, as the growing pains come and go. She still has this unfortunate tendency towards car sickness, so we (and by "we" I mean my husband) are hauling the 9,000-pound car seat up to our third-floor condo way more often than we'd like. Luckily all the covers come off for easy washing. So we're trying to be understanding of the craziness that must be going on in that little head of hers as she tries to make sense of the world.

  • It's been fascinating to watch the Peanut developing a sense of her own beauty. (On a side note, this whole topic has many complicated implications for me, since I spent much of my life being so convinced of my own ugliness.) But it turns out I must have some good genes in there somewhere, because in many ways she looks like me. Her cheeks and mouth are much like mine. But then she has those unimaginably lovely, sort of Asian eyes. When strangers see her, they sometimes do a double-take, and I imagine they're trying to figure out what her background is. In any event, though I hope it doesn't sound too obnoxious of me as the mom to say so, she is quite striking. And she's heard people say it enough times that she's starting to realize it for herself. Last night we played "fashion show," which is my ruse for making her try on things to see if they fit. I had been hoping to re-use last year's summer dresses, but at the rate she's growing, they're going to fall at her hips by this summer! She paraded in front of the mirror in outfit after outfit, a smile broadening on her face. It does my heart good to see her reveling in her own loveliness.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Four years

Today marks four years without my friend Bevin in the world.

Rest in peace my friend. I hope I will see you again someday.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Another burning question

Why must 9 out of every 10 movies Will Ferrell makes show him in 1970s-era shortie shorts and goofy hair? The guy has built his whole career on how funny he looks in these getups. I guess there's worse things to base a career on.

Burning questions

So at least according to one poll, George W. Bush's approval rating has dropped to 19 percent. Even if this number is off somewhat (most polls I've seen put his approval somewhere in the 20s) he still is undoubtedly one of the most reviled presidents of the modern age, certainly the most hated since Nixon. When will the mainstream media begin referring to Bush as "unpopular"? When will we see editorial page mea culpas from the major journalistic cheerleaders of the Iraq war?

And when will most of the average people who voted for this guy not once, but twice, finally admit they were wrong? Among the handful of Republicans I know, most just refuse to discuss politics anymore. It's hard to find former die-hard Bush supporters who will now publicly acknowledge they screwed up.

Also, what will the Republican party do with Bush at its next convention? Are they going to let him speak? How can they not have a speech from a sitting president in their own party? Only problem is everybody hates the guy. Will they put him on at 3 a.m. so nobody sees? That's going to be fascinating to watch.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Somebody help me

My previously sweet, adorable toddler is going through some hellacious Terrible 3s at the moment. Yesterday at school she got annoyed at another kid and poked him in the eye with a felt tip marker. Fortunately the little boy wasn't injured, but holy crap, this is coming out of nowhere. She never used to be like this! Now she keeps getting sent to the office for causing trouble.

She's not even three and a half yet! And Mr. Fraulein and I, having no previous experience with this kind of thing, can't figure out if we're dealing with it the right way. Our main approach so far has been the Counting to Three tactic ("I'm going to count to three, and if you don't stop jumping on the couch, we start taking away toys...") combined with revoking of TV privileges and "special treats" (chocolate, etc.) We'll see how it goes...

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Compare and contrast...



Thousands upon thousands of energized Obama supporters of every age and color yesterday in Madison, WI, vs. McCain's few dozen bored looking white folks. I hate to even say this for fear of jinxing it but I think maybe, just maybe, the good guys are going to WIN this time. Only question is how big a rout it will be.
I'm beginning to suspect the Republicans won't even be able to try to steal it this time. Voter fraud is a lot easier in close elections, like 2000 and 2004, than it is when three quarters of the country are chomping at the bit for dramatic change.
I desperately wanted my boy Al Gore to jump in there this time, but given that Obama is starting to look more and more like (Bill) Clinton and JFK and RFK rolled into one, I'll take it. Especially when the opposition is (or appears to be, which is what's important) 1,000 years old and wants to continue every Bush policy that's been soundly repudiated by most of the country.
Change is good. Yes we can!

Blogs you should read

If there isn't some kind of Bloggers All-Time Creative Writing Achievement Award, then there damn well should be. And Laid Off Dad should win it.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Things you notice when watching high-def DVDs on a high-def TV...

The main thing you notice is: people on TV have the same skin problems as the rest of us. I'm having serious "Office" withdrawal, so I've been re-watching Season 2 on DVD. Apparently NBC films its shows in high definition now, and it's amazing how much detail you can see. Steve Carell has some serious wrinkles going on. None of this was visible on our prehistoric TV. It seems the science of makeup artistry hasn't quite caught up with the HD revolution.

Big questions

The Peanut, this morning in the car: "Mommy, when is the world over?"

Me: "Um, what do you mean?"

Peanut: "When is the world over?"

Me: "Well, hopefully not for a while."

Monday, February 04, 2008

Public showers, tights, and big sparkly rings


I decided to tune in to a teeny bit of the Super Bowl coverage so I'd have some idea what my co-workers were talking about today. (And oh, the wailing and the gnashing of the teeth here in metro-Boston after the Patriots loss -- you have no idea...) So here's what the Super Bowl looks like to someone who knows absolutely zero about professional sports:

6:20 p.m.: Didn't there used to be big, splashy Pre-Game shows with lots of has-been musicians performing? Apparently they don't do those anymore, or if they do it was over by this time. All I see is a panel discussion among a group of fat neckless guys wearing suits. Each and every one of them looks supremely uncomfortable in his suit. You get the sense they'd all be much happier in polyester jogging outfits.

6:21 p.m.: Commercials.

6:26 p.m.: A brief break in the commercials so they can come back and breathlessly anticipate the "coin toss." A million people come out on the field to view the outcome. Will it be heads or tails?? Riveting. I can totally see why people get so into this...

6:28 p.m.: Commercials, including one wherein a former Super Bowl star delivers a rambling oration dedicated to the specialness of winning the contest and getting to wear the Super Bowl ring. The Super Bowl ring is shown on this man's finger in a lingering shot that looks like it's lit exclusively by candles, to maximize the sparkle of the ring's many, many diamonds. This is a ring that would look perfectly appropriate on the finger of a wealthy woman north of 70. THIS is what they give as a prize to these 20-year-old guys when they win? Why not a tweedy St. John suit and a Cartier brooch shaped like a bumblebee?
(Yes, I know the above photo shows a Patriots ring -- it was all I could find! No pictures of one with a Giants logo available online, apparently.)

6:35 p.m.: The commercials finally end and they start singing the national anthem. For some reason we're seeing soldiers in Iraq. Also occasionally we see a Fox News logo in the corner featuring some kind of animated football playing robot with enormous shoulders. Because, as we can see from the jewelry and the post-game communal showers and the tights, this is a game that is all about macho.

6:36 p.m.: I can't take it anymore and I turn it off.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Somebody needs to clean up this mess

Being in kind of a self-flagellating mood last night, I tuned in to the Chimp's final State of the Union address. Normally I like to spare myself the agony of listening to him speak but I was curious about how he would try to position his "legacy."

The thing that jumped out at me was the overall tone of, "We need somebody new to take charge and clean up this mess." Regardless of the topic, he implied that things have been screwed up long enough, and now, by God, somebody better do something about it.

Um, who the hell has been in charge for the last seven years? This is an inconsistency that will NEVER be pointed out by our broken, pathetic media.

Also, I loved that there was exactly one reference to the Hurricane Katrina aftermath -- that some conference or other is going to be held soon in New Orleans. I guess that means things are all hunky-dory down there now.

Monday, January 28, 2008

I knew I loved Brattleboro

This weekend we visited our awesome friends in Brattleboro, Vermont. There was a birthday party for my friend's husband, attended by about 20 adults and 10 kids, so the Peanut was beside herself with glee. As always happens when we get together with these people, the Peanut and our friends' two little girls ran amok for the entire weekend, scattering stuffed animals and crayons and approximately 50 million My Little Pony figurines in their wake. There were many wardrobe changes ("Look what I found in my summer clothes drawer! I'm putting on my Easter dress!") and dramatic performances ("Look at us -- we're ballerina fairies!")

When, at 7:30 p.m. on Saturday night, the Peanut and the other 3-year-old announced that they were tired and wanted to go to bed, we grown-ups were actually naive enough to believe they meant it. "They've worn themselves out. They'll crash now because the sugar's worn off," we said.

Finally at midnight, after each of us had made about 50 trips upstairs to bellow, "That's it! NOW you girls have to get to sleep!!" there was silence, when our friends' little girls both crashed in the older girl's room, and the Peanut declared that after all that she wanted to sleep with me and Mr. Fraulein. At which point she got in bed between us, kicked us in the head for 20 minutes, and then went to sleep.

Ten minutes later it was 7 a.m., and the Peanut's presence was requested: the Moose Parade that all the girls had been planning the night before was about to get underway. (When you live in Vermont, apparently you end up with a lot of stuffed animal, uh, mooses.) So she bounded out of bed like she'd been sleeping for 12 hours, and they all started thundering around the house once again.

So all in all it was another excellent Brattleboro weekend, complete with a pictureque light snowfall, which we watched from our friends' dining room as we ate breakfast yesterday morning.

And then this morning I read Bob Cesca's blog and saw this, which only confirms the general fabulousness of Brattleboro.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

How's your 401K doing now?

So it's official: they broke the economy. Just like Reagan. Just like Bush the first.

Compare and contrast: in the 90s, we weren't at war with anybody, and our 401Ks were booming. Today we're stuck in a pointless war that will probably go on for years if not decades in some form, and the stock market is tanking.

Back then, every quarter I'd get my 401K statement in the mail and marvel at how much money I had made. Clinton screwed an intern. Bush II has screwed the entire country, and we'll continue to be screwed for years to come because of eight years of this nightmare. Heck of a job!

Friday, January 18, 2008

A grave threat to public health

Weapons-grade snark from TRex today:

Indeed. It is a public health hazard that should be stopped at once! No more! No more shall the health and safety of our children be jeopardized by a bunch of men who want to dress up in their funny outfits and violently slam into and clutch at each other, crawl all over each other out in a big field, then slap each other on the ass and go shower together.